I didn’t think I would be able to have children. That’s what the doctors told me. The words rang in my ears and burnt into my soul for 4 years. Then as if by magic a little girl managed to make it through all those cysts and damage and miraculously we both survived – barely. She made me a mum, my baby girl!
We didn’t try for another baby. What were the chances of 2 miracles? The nightmares began again after I lost 2 babies a year apart. I was devastated. My body was a weapon and I didnt know how to save them.
When the doctor told me he could confirm a healthy heartbeat a year later, I was scared. My daughter was 5 and I was already resigned to the idea of one child. I could not survive another loss emotionally. But this little fighter kept growing. He was stronger and bigger than his sister. No need for constant HCG monitoring, no doubt of his strentgh and his will to meet us. His kicks were vigorous as if he wanted me to know he was there, he moved whenever he heard his sister’s voice . My heart skipped a beat everytime I saw him on the scan or felt him flutter around.
Now he turns 18 months….a full year and a half. All of the pain and hurt erased by droolly kisses and chubby thighs. I cannot believe how time has flown by. Words cannot express everything I wish for him or how much these months have meant to us. Finally our family is complete.
Living with PCOS and Endometriosis is not easy. The pains have started again, but that familiar feeling that haunted me all these years, robbing me of hope, is replaced instead by a feeling of victory.
I did not beat it, but my babies did.
There is hope.
There are survival stories.
It can happen.
Hang in there,